[beebee21]

The day of Pref Night was crazy! I tried really hard to focus since it was the first day of the semester, but my mind was completely preoccupied with what was potentially going to happen that night. I felt good about Raspberry and Blueberry, but I knew nothing in recruitment was sure. I tried not to get my hopes up, but it was so hard not to! I knew I'd still be happy if Blackberry was on my schedule tonight, too, so I felt like my odds were good.

Finally, it was 7:30 PM and I could go to the hotel! My first party started at 8, but I wanted to be a little bit early so I would have time to gussy up and calm my nerves before pref night officially began.

Walking to my seat that night was the most nerve-wracking walk of all. There were only going to be 1 or 2 chapters on my schedule, and hopefully one of those was going to be my new home in less than 24 hours.

I took a deep breath as I stood in front of my chair, fishing the schedule out of my name tag. It wasn't there. My heart sank.

I looked around nervously for my RC, but I couldn't find her. Had this all been a mistake? Was she supposed to call me and let me know all 5 chapters had decided to drop me? What had I done?

Finally, I spotted her and told her what was going on. She told me they hadn't handed out the pref schedules yet, I suspected just to make all of us panic a little bit longer. She handed mine to me and smiled.

Raspberry
Blueberry

I was so excited! I quickly rushed to the PNM bathroom with some friends and we re-applied our make up and checked our dresses. It was cocktail attire that night, and all of the sisters were dressed so beautifully in black dresses. Everyone looked like a supermodel, and while it was intimidating, I was starting to feel like pretty soon I was going to get to be a part of the glamour and the sisterhood! The pref parties would be an hour each, and Blueberry was up first.

Because each chapter shares a ritual at pref night, I will not go in to much detail about what happened at these parties because these rituals are sacred and I respect that very much. I will, however, tell you about how incredible the sisterhood of both chapters was that night, and how I felt more emotional that night than I had since my high school graduation.

Blueberry was decorated absolutely beautifully. I was preffed by a girl I had not talked to before, and I felt a little disappointed it wasn't someone I had built a relationship with already. She told me all the wonderful things she had heard about me, and how excited she was to pref me. They handed us each four notes. Two of mine were written by girls I had gotten to know, and two were written by girls I hadn't had the pleasure of meeting, but who were eager to have me in their sisterhood anyway. We were all presented by name to the chapter, and I couldn't help feeling like it was so natural for my name to be with theirs. I looked around realizing some of these girls might be in my pledge class. A sister got up and told a funny and tearful story about what the sisterhood had meant to her. The girls laughed through their tears, and the genuine emotion I saw was extremely compelling. I felt so comfortable in this group, and when the party was over, I felt like I was already a part of it. I left feeling extremely emotional, because I had felt so sure of who I was going to choose as my number one before the party, but now I knew I would really have to think seriously about it.

We had about ten minutes between parties, but I didn't feel the need to primp before Raspberry. Not because I didn't care, but because I felt like it didn't matter to them if my make-up was perfect or if my hair was a little out of place. I had already started to feel like these girls were my sisters over the last few days, and I felt accepted by them. When I walked in, the girls were singing softly, and I was greeted by the girl from the second day, the one I had absolutely adored. I was so excited she was going to pref me! The theme was definitely different than the previous party, but was still beautiful and fun! A senior got up to tell a story about what the sisterhood meant to her, and her story was so incredibly touching that even I started to tear up, and I am not a crier. I didn't even know these girls, but her story was so amazing and showed so clearly how much love everyone had for each other, that it was hard not to be moved. She said something very profound that I have never forgotten. "When you're a Raspberry, you stop referring to each other as your sorority sisters, because there's no difference between the sisters your parents gave you and the sisters sitting in this room." They all nodded in agreement and clapped, and I knew this was it. I had known since day one and I was still sure of it that Raspberry was exactly where I wanted to be. I really did love Blueberry but I felt like I had to go with my instincts.

I thought about it carefully as I walked back to the PNM room and waited in line for a computer to open up. I was pretty sure I had made my decision, and was ready to rank. Since the next night was bid night, we ranked our remaining two sororities.

1. Raspberry
2. Blueberry

Because we were at the hotel so late, the public transportation had stopped running. Panhel had provided bus shuttles to take us from from the hotel back to the dorms. I sat next to my orientation/RC group friend. She had been to the same two pref parties as me that night, and we had ranked them the same. We were excited at the prospect of being sisters.

"You're going to be a Raspberry," she said. "I've been telling you that since day 1."

I just smiled. I hoped she would be right, but I knew either way, I was going to end up somewhere I loved, even if I loved Raspberry a little bit more passionately. I trusted the system, so far it had steered me in the right direction. We were giddy and chatty all the way home, and that night I slept better than I had in a long time.