[aephi alum]

Going back to the original topic ...

If you, as a PNM, are invited to pref at two chapters, it's because each of those two chapters sees you as a good fit for the chapter and would love to have you as a sister.

However, you may love chapter A and despise chapter B. It's a tough choice - do you suicide chapter A and give up the chance that you might be given a bid to chapter A as a quota addition? Or do you list both groups, and take the risk that you'll get a bid to chapter B?

In the latter case, what do you do if you do get a bid from chapter B? Do you rip up the bid card and run back to your dorm crying, or do you give the chapter a chance? I advise the latter in this case - give 'em a few weeks and then decide whether you want to initiate. During recruitment, you may only meet a small fraction of the sisters, and you have spent maybe a few hours with the chapter. The new member period gives you a chance to meet the rest of the chapter, including your pledge sisters, and make a more informed decision about whether to initiate. Hey, you're bound for a year anyway.

But recruitment is a very emotional time, and I can easily picture a young 17-year-old showing up for bid day absolutely SURE that she will get a bid from her first choice, and when she gets a bid from "only" her second or third choice (or no bid at all), it's her first experience with rejection, and off she goes crying.