Quote:
Originally Posted by sunnyday
On one hand, I see young ladies being referred to as "stupid" for declining a bid to a house they really don't feel they are a good fit for. On the other hand, I have seen threads where PNMs are encouraged to "maximize your options" and "keep an open mind". What is the best route for a PNM, then? Should she keep an open mind all the way through pref and if, after attending pref, she really can't see herself in a certain chapter, not list them on her bid card? What if that means suiciding? Isn't that also frowned upon here? But isn't the PNM who just wants letters also frowned upon? It just seems as though there is conflicting advice. On one hand, don't just want to be in any house for the sake of wanting letters. On the other hand, don't suicide because that's not keeping an open mind. But if you don't suicide and get a bid to a house you don't want, then you're being stupid if you decline it. I'm sure this is confusing to PNMs.
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Yes, it is very important to keep an open mind during recruitment and maximize your options. ALL NPC orgs (since we're talking about NPC recruitment) are great groups. And when it comes down to pref night, PNMs have an important decision to make. Is there a chapter that a PNM truly could NEVER see herself being a part of for some reason? What is that reason? Is there a chance her opinion could change after getting to know these women as sisters, without the pressures of recruitment? SIPing (suiciding) is generally seen as a bad idea, and that is because PNMs often aren't aware of how they might
actually fit into a chapter. They have never been in a sorority, and don't know what it will be like to be part of that sisterhood. A PNM who SIPs may be precluding herself from a lifetime of membership in a great organization just because she had a few awkward conversations during recruitment. So, continuing to have an open mind through the NM period is key. If a woman has honestly given her chapter a try and doesn't feel comfortable being initiated, that's fine.
Hopefully that answered your question! You're right, it is tricky.