Quote:
Originally Posted by TonyB06
Fair enough, but don't you feel just a teeny bit warmer toward the guy if, after offering to pay for the first date (even if you asked him out), he overrides and insists that he pay? ..call it a spasm of chivalry or something.
Why does online vs. traditional meeting makes such a difference to you?
I'm sure I'm probalby missing the subtext of your "entitlement" point. You're not saying you're more entitled to refuse him a BJ becuase you paid, are you? I mean, he's not "entitled" to services no matter who paid, right?
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Yeah, it's nice, but I really don't care one way or the other. Personal baggage: my first boyfriend had ISSUES with money and the management thereof. He would do stuff like buying me a dozen roses, a stuffed animal and a card, and then 10 minutes later be like "honey, can I borrow $10? I need to get a haircut." I wish he would have skipped the stupid roses and used his money wisely. (When I met his family eventually, I COMPLETELY understood where this came from.) Needless to say I learned NOT to rely on a man for everything.
If I'm emancipated enough to ask a guy out, he should be emancipated enough to not think I'm cutting his balls off if I pay.
As far as traditional vs online meeting: if a guy I know in real life asks me out on a date, either I've known him long enough or he's been vetted enough by friends that I know he's probably not going to pull any passive aggressive dick moves, like making me feel "obligated" if he pays. Meeting someone for the first time from match.com or whatever - I have NO idea if this guy's going to be all he said he was. A guy who's seemed like a nice, sweet guy can pull PADMs like it's going out of style or be a straight up psycho. I would rather be on an even footing in the smallest things - like paying for a drink - than take the risk of having someone I don't know think I "owe" him in any way, shape or form.