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In re-reading the OP, I'm thinking that she wasn't asking what to do about the guy as much as she wants to understand the psychology of hazing from those who don't view it as horrible. I could be wrong, but if she sees something like paddling as something you could only do with anger and hate, then she doesn't understand why her boyfriend would participate, so she's asking for another perspective.
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Theta Nu Xi Multicultural Sorority, Inc.
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