I think it really depends on whether or not they were Greek when you started dating them. My high school sweetheart and I dated for 4 1/2 years. I joined AXO my sophomore year of college, and then he joined Sigma Nu the next year. Before he was Greek, everything was pretty much the same. I joined AXO b/c I went to school in the same city I grew up in and all my friends went away to school. I didn't know anyone at my college, other than my boyfriend (which of course, put a strain on the relationship, itself). So, I decided to go through rush, had a blast, and joined the best chapter on campus. We had made a promise to each other that if we felt we were being led away from our relationship by our organizations that we wouldn't participate (We didn't know what to expect. Being Greek was new to both of us). Well, I upheld my end of that promise, but he didn't. Basically, I feel that a fraternity's demands on a guy are very different from a sorority's demands on a girl. Sororities encourage relationships of all kinds (friendships, families and romance), while fraternities (at least at my school) encouraged brotherhood, and anything outside of that "took away from the fraternity experience." I heard some of his brothers tell him that you can't have a serious relationship and be in a fraternity at the same time. My opinion is that he should have been stronger willed and stood up to his brothers regarding us, but I guess you fight for what you want, and I wasn't a priority at the time. Now, after he and I broke up, I dated a few other Greek men on campus, and it was different b/c they were Greek when we started dating. It still didn't work for me b/c by that point I was about to graduate and had shifted my priorities from partying to studying, and from hooking up to wanting a relationship that would last more than a month. All in all, I think that dating a fraternity guy was a good experience, and I wouldn't change my college years for anything, but I'm happy now that I'm engaged to a man who is out of school, focused on us and has priorities in line with mine. I'm not saying that if this relationship doesn't work that I wouldn't date a guy just b/c he was Greek, but I'd make sure that he was out of school, for one (you change your focus after college), and that, while his fraternity should be important to him, it didn't rule his life or dictate his relationships. All in all, I think it depends on the guy!
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