[KappaStargirl]

1) The whole cast of "Friends." Your show was never funny, and you all could stand a cheesecake. Or 10.

2) Cameron Diaz- SHE HAS NO BUTT!! Enough said

3) I'm with Stillwater on P.Diddy. Are you striving for Artist-Formerly-Known-As status?

4) Kirsten Dunst-- Soooo vapid

5) Britney Spears. I have a much better voice than she does. I also wear a normal person's dress size. Guess there's no hope for me.

sorry, I just get all worked up over stick celebrities. What's wrong with just being healthy and having boobs and a butt?

6) Jonathan Franzen. You are a snob and I heard your book sucked anyway.

7) J.K. Rowling. I love your books. You are smart. Write that #$%%^&^*^%$#@!#$%^&*!ing book already I'm tired of waiting.

but to end on a happy note, Drew Carey, I say THANK YOU. Because of you, my very good friend from grad school has a job she loves (she works for the Cleveland Public Library) and is bringing great teen literature to the world.