Quote:
Originally Posted by KSig RC
I've read carefully, which is how I've expertly diagnosed your exceptional cognitive dissonance. (NOTE: I don't diagnose things, and I'm not an expert)
Here's the thing - you're essentially saying "it's the rapist's fault, but she didn't have to be there in the first place." This is the same as saying "she did something wrong" because, after all, she chose a bad situation over a good one - which is blaming the victim. It can't be both - it can't be wholly one person's fault, but the other person contributed. So we simply cannot, cannot hedge and say "it's the rapist's fault, BUT..." in any way. We can argue about the dude who didn't buy insurance and his house burned down, but here, there's another element involved: human choice. The guy made a choice and that eliminates ANY issues from the woman's side - even "putting herself at risk."
I know you really don't want to blame the victim - I honestly think you don't feel you are blaming the victim, and instead think it's a matter of a horrible man and a woman who made questionable or unfortunate decisions. But there isn't more than 100% blame here, and it can't be both.
Similarly, saying "I wouldn't have done ______" is usually the essence of cognitive dissonance, and (to come full circle) is Page 1 of the "how to get women to let a guy off for rape" defense attorney's handbook (which was my original point). It's all good - it's a strong natural force, and we all do it.
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Okay, last post tonight...for real. I'll have to catch up in the morning.
So, here goes.
The article was posted in the OP. I read it.
Based on the account, the way I interpreted the events was this gay guy walked into the private party in a private residence of a fraternity (that I think he knew something about), and based on his attire, it caused a fight.
Should the fraternity guy have put his hands on him, no.
But, by the same token, the gay guy should not have presented himself in a way that provoked the incident - that is where, in this case, I blame the gay guy. It was a situation specific incident.
Now, had this gay guy been walking down the street, and the events occurred the same way, then, by all means, the fraternity is 100% to blame.
What I am saying is that I don't think the gay guy is completely innocent.
THEN!!! Just as that discussion died down, it was you, I believe, who decided to stir the pot, and bring rape into it, by making a similar comparison to the OP.