[shopgirl]

Originally posted by DeltAlum
Just to keep it in perspective, remember that there were different expectations for the men as well. The men were "expected" to be the sole financial support for the family. Each family probably had only one car, so the "soccer mom" syndrome had not yet started. There were many fewer opportunities for kids, so "Mom" wasn't constantly running kids all over their zip code. In fact, come to think of it, there weren't any zip codes. We all had "party line" phones which we shared with two to several neighbors.

Another thing to keep in mind is that we are talking about the era just after WWII and before Korea, when millions of men (and some women) returned from the armed services at age 22 or 23 and were struggling to get their lives and families started. The job market was OK, but there was a huge glut of young men, who had been away for as long as four or five years, just trying to make ends meet for their new families. Most of them had a high school education at very best. Most of them would not go to college and wanted to return home to live close to their family. Remember, too, that this was the beginning of the famous "baby boom" with everyone starting families at the same time.

The whole societal structure was different and the stresses on the sexes where not even in the same galaxy as they are today. They simply can't be compared. Also remember that these were children of the Great Depression, with completely different mindsets than we have now.

Add to all of that the brand new force for social change which was just beginning to sway the way society functions -- television. Remember that these were the very early days of that medium -- and that everything that was portrayed was what was considered "the ideal." In those days, the ideal was that Dad went off to eight hours of highly satisifying work in the office, while the perfectly behaved children went off to school (which they loved), and Mom kept the kitchen floor shiny wearing a dress and her high heels between bridge games with the neighbors.

Was it ever like that? Of course not. But that really is the way everyone wanted it to be. Really. Including the majority of the women. It was the dream. The ideal. I watched my mom, who was divorced in the late 40's, about the time I was born, and who never remarried, struggle with all of that. Trying to imitate as much of it as she could while eeking out a living as a car hop/waitress and trying (and ultimately gaining just a little success) with her own small business. By the way, she only had a 4th grade education due to the deaths of her father and mother and the responsibility of raising younger siblings, but she was one of the brightest people I've ever met.

On the other side of the coin, my wife's mother and grandmother both had college degrees -- nearly unheard of in those days. They both stayed at home and raised their families and enjoyed their lives. Yes, I've asked them. It was what they wanted.

That's what the real difference is. Expectation. Desires. Social climate.

And that's why you can only look at that list and either chuckle or study it with interest as a social phenominon of a bygone era. It isn't fair to hold it to a standard created by hindsight.

Also, when you criticize that kind of desired lifestyle, aren't you insulting that generation of men and women? That definition of Utopia was what they wanted, hoped for and expected. Mom didn't want to work to be able to afford the second BMW. A little three bedroom house in the 'burbs was OK. Not everyone wore braces.

Would you expect a 1952 Ford to compare favorably with a 2002?

It was just different, and it frustrates me to see what was a very satisifying way of life for that generation criticized in the light of generations that have changed dramatically over the course of half a century. Five decades. Fifty years. Do you know how much the world and technology have changed over that amount of time.

Don't criticize what was considered "good" back then. Embrace it and celebrate how far we've (you've) managed to come.

So, was it "better" then? Is it "better" now? I don't think so. I think it's simply different. Different times, different generations, different mindsets. Who defines "better." Those were, after all, "The good old days." Weren't they?

I think it's "better" to look at it, analyze it and celebrate the strides that have been made. Some of them are good.

Now, where can I hide this soapbox?

I HEAR YOU, DELT ALUM!

I appreciate all you've said. I love to analyze, so I enjoy reading your perspective.