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AOPilicious, I think you must be a very strong sister to have volunteered to deliver those painful phone calls. I'm sorry two of them took such a horrible and unexpected turn.
Although it's easier not to call the alumna sister at all and cite privacy concerns of the PNM, the reality is that the alumna is your sister and the PNM is not. You have a stronger obligation to your sister than to the PNM.
I have two little girls, whose college experiences are many years in the future. When I read the recruitment threads on GC, I sometimes fast-forward to when my daughter might be that tearful PNM who was cut from her favorite house. I can't change the outcome and I can't take her pain away, but if I have a little advance warning I can be prepared to help her cope like only a mother can.
Occasionally, you may encounter a psycho mom like the two AOPilicious had to deal with. But overall, your sister will appreciate you helping her help her daughter through a painful experience.
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