We neither have a matriarch nor a patriarch of my family.
I love my parents but my parents are my parents; and there's no "leader" in the sense of matriarch or patriarch. If there was, that would drive me absolutely crazy and I would eventually have to tell that person to shut up and find a hobby.
The same goes for the "my family" thing. It is cultural and all things are wonderful in moderation. But, after a while, it can become overbearing. Caroline's meeting with Danielle was an example of a silly attempt at being the matriarch and defender of a family as though your meeting and opinion on the matter is THE CONCLUSION. I blame the show's producers and bad acting, but...Womp Womp. Snore.