I thought these were hilarious! Hell, I'm 30 years old and I fit most of them!!!! In my day, it would have been more like this:
I am a sorority bitch. My daddy is loaded and my mom taught me everything I know. I have lots of Daddy's credit cards. I use them in J. Crew, The Limited, and the men's Polo department at Dillard's. I wear lots of Polo.....everything I own has that little f*cking horse on it. Even my scrunchie white socks that I wear with my Bass bucs. I wear gold jewelry.....lots of it. I have big gold hoop earrings that look so sophisticated when my hair is all slicked back in my big bitch bow. I have lots of bitch bows and I have hair scrunchies in every imaginable color and pattern. I buy plaid grosgrain ribbon at the sewing store to make hairbows out of too. They match the letters on my sorority sweatshirt and my bitch bag. I have a killer tan......I go tanning at least once a week, sometimes more. I leave parties at midnight to make my tanning appointment, then come back.
I have a cool car. It's a Nissan/Toyota/Acura/Jeep Wrangler/VW Cabriolet Convertible. Daddy bought it for me. I have a CD player in my car (installed aftermarket of course.) I carry a different Coach purse with every outfit, and I carry them to class. I carry them to fraternity parties and I lock them in the room of the guy I plan to shack with. We go to bars and drink Hudy Delight and this really cool new drink called Zima. We like to dance to "Jump Around" by House of Pain and "Jump" by Kriss Kross.
We have to be able to laugh at ourselves.......I think if we admit it, all of us see at least SOMETHING of ourself in those!!!!!
