33girl,
That's an interesting perspective I hadn't really considered. I always thought I would be so proud to go back to my chapter if it was thriving and know I played a tiny part in helping it do well. I don't think the not being someone who would get a bid now thing would bother me unless the women were just rude and full of themselves. If they were rude to me as an alumna of that chapter... THAT is what I would find truly offensive.
I think I'd rather have a chapter to return to if given the choice, but I hear what you are saying.
Quote:
Originally Posted by 33girl
Well, yes. That's part of it.
If the women before you had not chosen you, and if you had not chosen the women after you, it wouldn't have been the same chapter that you gained so much from. For whatever reason, these women weren't what the campus deemed an "upper tier" chapter. And the women were what made the chapter for you.
I'm also from a closed chapter, and as much as it sucks that we're closed, as much as it sucks that I go back on campus and don't see our letters, I think it would have sucked MORE to see that chapter, with that chapter designation that means something very special, change into something unrecognizable (either through national intervention or just through time). I know some of my friends in other sororities have dealt with this - coming back and looking at the chapter as it is now and realizing that if they'd been going through rush today, they'd NEVER get a bid. That kind of hurts, even if the chapter is "more successful" than it was when you were there.
I know that kind of thing lessens as you get older but I honestly think that we all have a bond from that struggle and it covers a huge age group, much more than I see in some of the stronger groups. The mixers we didn't have back then kind of pale next to the love for each other we have now.
That's why I got kind of annoyed at the "oh no, your chapters closed, how life must suck for you" attidude in the post I quoted.
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