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I've been doing some reading online about legacies being cut. I came across some very sad reactions from the moms whose legacy daughters were cut. (One of the pages referenced here came up in the search. Please note that I am not singling them out. I also found public pages with people from other sororities, and others that are in general college forums).
Needless to say, the sentiment is being echoed by alumnae of many sororities. Many of the women post stories about their legacy daughter being cut from from the legacy sorority or chapter. Many are vowing to stop all volunteer and financial support to the national organization. They share stories of how they are crushed they are (the moms), that the chapter dared to cut their daughters, many of whom are "amazing" and "accomplished."
(Let me say that I GET it. It's hard when all of your adult life, you dream about sharing your sisterhood with your daughter, only to have it fall apart. I'm not saying it's easy.)
Some moms insisted that legacies should always be offered bids, regardless of whether the girl "fit" the chapter, or that a legacy should always be chosen over a non-legacy even if the girl is lacking in grades/activities/etc.
One mom bemoaned the fact that collegiates are (paraphrased) too inexperienced and immature to be making decisions that they shouldn't be making, and that are not in the best interests of ABC. Someone else agreed, and said that today's chapters are "making their own rules and decisions".
Hmm...Isn't this the way that they themselves were chosen? By the members of the Chapter? Why was it okay then, but not now? Were they all legacies to start out with?
One mom said that when she was a PNM, she was a legacy. She told all the other sororities that she only wanted ABC and that they cut her. She muses as to what would have happened if ABC had cut her - she would be devastated because it meant that "no one wanted me".
Others suggested that the mom/grandmother contact nationals and insist that they know WHY their daughter was cut, that if enough people complain, it will make the nationals come down on the chapter because OBVIOUSLY, the chapter is doing SOMETHING wrong.
In several of these places, women have come forward to explain some of the reasons why legacies may be cut - purely from a logistical perspective - but the words seem to fall on deaf ears.
It's a tough situation all around but the bottom line is, you can't always get what you want. Why not make the best out of what you DO have? These moms are preventing their daughters from finding their own sources of happiness, whether it be through another chapter, or even if they don't become greek.
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