Quote:
Originally Posted by carnation
We need to give the PNMs the benefit of the doubt in their choices and not second guess why they made them. When they say they had their reasons for cutting ABC, why should we run them down? I cut one good sorority because they were heavily, heavily into athletics and I figured they'd hate me when I didn't want to sign up for a sport. I cut one of those considered "top tier" because they were so condescending and rude to me and all those around me. I would've been ticked if someone on an anonymous board had said, "Yeah, we know you cut them because they were small, snob." I discussed this recently with a woman who was a PH officer when I helped advise at one SEC school--she said that she cut ABC when she rushed because they were so into winning the Greek musical shows and she figured they'd hate her when she began to sing. That chapter is fantastic.
Truth is, we have no idea why they cut who they cut. Actually, many of us hardly remember the reasons our teenage selves cut groups.
Yeah, in an ideal world, all the girls who were cut would band together and strengthen a smaller group. Why won't they? Because especially at a huge school , they will know at most a couple other girls who dropped out and especially in the South, no one (including PanHellenic) is going to hang out a banner that says "Meeting at 6 tonight for girls who dropped out of rush". Other teenagers would be too embarrassed to show up. Also, they would have to arrange something with a group that wanted to take them all on. How would they? And what would happen if the group didn't care for some of the girls?
Have you ever seen this in a small town? There's an older unmarried woman and some of the locals keep saying, "She didn't have to be single, Billy Bob and Bobby Bill wanted to marry her." She has to hear this crap the rest of her life even though both men might have been worthless crackers...why should she have to listen to people second-guessing what she felt to be the right decision for her? Why should we be playing Lofty Greeks With Insight who say, "You had the choice to be Greek, you cut the only groups who wanted you." That's horribly rude. You don't know why they cut them, you don't know why they were cut. Some people on here have been rude enough to say "your dream sororities didn't want you." How do you know? Actually at many big schools, the sororities would love to have dozens of the girls they cut but they had to cut huge numbers. Have you ever been in a room where the sorority is required to cut hundreds of girls in one night? 
What gives anyone the right to decide why a teenager cuts a group? If you weren't there, you don't know. |
She cut the only groups that still wanted her on pref night. We don't know why she was cut from the other groups, and no one has claimed to. But as has been pointed out, those groups that cut her wanted other girls
more for
some reason. She stated her reasons for cutting the groups and we pointed out that they were, in fact, coming across as very shallow reasons. She didn't disagree.
There's not harassing a PNM and there's being frank with her. If she goes into recruitment again, not considering these 2 chapters, she's cut her odds immediately. If the other chapters have to cut heavily as a rule, and these 2 don't, then she's cut her odds even MORE. Point this out doesn't mean we're ruining her life, her happiness or her recruitment.
This PNM wasn't stomped on she was given the reality check she asked for.