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I'm glad you're not letting them get you down! From what you've described the Tom Cruises seem to be a large and popular fraternity and while their actions were rude, thoughtless, and disorganized my guess is that they have the ability to rush on reputation and don't really need to be courteous. This will hurt them in the long run, but unfortunately they can get away with being douche bags for the time being.
Here's hoping they aren't my brothers...
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"Delta Chi is not a weekend or once-a-year affair but a lifelong opportunity and privilege"
- Albert Sullard Barnes
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