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Old 05-19-2009, 08:16 AM
DrPhil DrPhil is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2008
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Quote:
Originally Posted by christiangirl View Post
I understand that the woman did not mean to be offensive, but I don't like being referred to as "you people" no matter what the context. I don't like the way it sounds and, while I won't walk away or fuss, the look on my face reflects that sentiment. There's nothing contradictory about that.
Well, "you people" can have non-race implications that depend on the tone and the context. That's just something to keep in mind because the longer you live, the more you'll experience.

But, if something catches your attention, and you want to give the person the benefit of the doubt, simply say in a neutral tone "yes, many Americans only like crab legs...but some of us eat whole crabs." Even if the person was being racial, that can remove whatever context that person intended and many people will get the point. If they are adament, they will try to assert the racial implications by saying "no, I meant Black people" to which you can respond with "oh, please, next time just say 'Black people' instead of 'you people'...I find that plenty of Black people love whole crabs if we can find restaurants that serve it, etc."

Facial expressions can be passive aggressive and just as silly as walking away or fussing. Most professional and nonprofessional contexts are opportunities for adults to talk and to learn, in nonconfrontational and noncondescending tones. Again, facial expressions can be extremely confrontational and passive aggressive, so next time also simply talk to your "colored" classmate.

Last edited by DrPhil; 05-19-2009 at 08:26 AM.
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