[AGDee]

In 1995, I was very involved in chat rooms on CompuServe. I was part of a tight knit channel (what they called chat on Cserve). A lot of the folks ended up having regular get togethers but they were pretty party oriented and I was a wife and mom so I never went. I did become very good chat friends with one of the men on the channel who was from Atlanta. He was newly divorced and just out of the Air Force after 17 years. I used to give him dating advice, we played Scrabble online together and talked about everything and anything. We got along great and had similar senses of humor. We talked for over 5 years. I got divorced in 2000 and he was going to be in Ohio for business. He asked if I could meet him for dinner because he wanted to meet his friend face to face. I knew many people who had met him in person and had heard nothing but good about him so I trusted him. I met him in Ohio for dinner. It was then that we discovered that we had an amazing chemistry that we didn't expect. We saw each other a few more times but realized quickly that it was a pretty hopeless situation since I had young kids, 50-50 custody and couldn't move. He had a really good job and his family was all in Atlanta and moving wasn't an option for him either. So, we stuck to emailing and chatting occasionally while we both continued on with our lives, other relationships, etc. We hadn't emailed in about a year when I found him on Facebook in January. He is single again, I am single. We realized that we've been talking for 14 years now. Our communications have increased a lot but I still have 5 years before I'd be available to move and, quite honestly, anybody hoping to find a job and move to Michigan is purely out of luck. We did realize though, that after 14 years, only 5 more doesn't seem like so much. We will continue to lead our lives as we have, dating, etc. but we have decided that if, in 5 years, when my youngest goes away to college, we feel like we do today and there is nobody else in the picture for either of us, I will move to Atlanta and we will finally get a chance to see if "we" can work. We are making plans to see each other a couple times this summer. How's that for a long distance relationship?

ETA: It sounds so crazy in writing. I am a big believer in fate though and decided several years ago that if we are meant to be, then all will work out. He has had several 2-3 year relationships and they have not worked out for him. He totally shares my cynicism towards marriage and usually ends up breaking up when the woman gets tired of just living together and wants to get married. In the meantime, he will remain one of my best friends. If he finds happiness with someone else, then I am happy for him. In some weird way, I never feel jealous about his relationships, as long as I have our friendship. It's so weird.