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I'm going to defend Sphinxpoet a bit here. I don't think he meant "demand" in the literal sense. I think he meant more that generally men only do what women, by tacit and implicit acceptance, allow them to do. When women don't get the courtesy afforded to us by gender and common sense, then we should respond accordingly. I've seen too many women, when confronted with a man who does not open the door for us, or doesn't pull out our chair, merely accept his behavior as deviant and unlearned. Just like there are many young women now a days who are raised to be profligate with their bodies and unmindful of general femininity and etiquette, let's not forget that young men have been raised by these same parents. Therefore, what we look at as disrespect may indeed be ignorance.
Women "should be" the emotional centers in the male/female continuum. We do have a lot of control over what men do and do not do--and not always by speaking. Our actions, a smile, a nod, a shudder, a simple suggestion, can work wonders.
I have a very good male friend who had a bad habit of being wonderfully chivalrous when the mood was good, but deficient when he was angry. We had a disagreement, and when I came around to the car, he was already sitting in it. He refused to open the door for me. I asked. He refused. I went back into my house, and I didn't talk to him for a year. We are friends again, and he has since learned that no matter how upset he becomes, common courtesy is still in effect. This is an extreme example to be sure, but I could have just as easily sighed and gotten into the car anyway. I would have been reaffirming, however, that it's okay to lose the chivalry bit whenever the mood strikes.
Final note, I have noticed a certain percentage of women who get offended when a guy tries to be chivalrous. They look at the guy as old-fashioned or trying to "coming onto them." Therefore, I've seen chivalrous guys become "shell-shocked" trying to determine whether we will be offended or not. Men, just do it anyway and women, just accept it for what it is--common courtesy.
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