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So, I have been reading these forums for just about two weeks or so, and reading this thread it seems the biggest problem with the switch from traditional to balanced man is the fact that everyone feels like its hard to build a strong bond with the other members. Correct me if I'm wrong, there is a lot of material in this thread that I merely skimmed over.
First, let me introduce myself. I am a freshman at Northern Kentucky University, who joined SigEp three days after my orientation. I knew from talking to all the members that I would not fit in the other fraternities, and that this was the place for me. We also are a Balanced Man chapter, not a traditional. I just went through Sigma not too long ago, last week actually, and honestly... I have such a great bond with the rest of the brothers in my Sigma class, and the rest of the fraternity.
Talking to one of the older brothers one night during the first month of the fall semester, he said to me. "You know, brotherhood is not formed through ritual, events, mixers, or anything like that. It is always going to be done through random nights where you and some of the brothers are just hanging out, or through those nights of hell where your brothers will help you through it." That could not be more true. Whether you be in a traditional chapter, or a balanced man chapter, think of the nights where you truly formed a bond with other brothers in your pledge class, or your sigma class. Think of the night that you decided who your big brother was going to be. Where did you find that bond? I'm pretty sure its going to be a random story to be told about a random night, or perhaps a time where you had something to deal with and they helped you through.
I don't know, maybe what I am trying to say is not even being said, I have a massive headache right now. What i will say though, the bond that i have with the brothers in my Sigma class, and the rest of the brothers in my chapter could not be stronger. The nights we have spent together and the stories we have to share together is what formed that brotherhood i have with them. To add onto it, my brothers are the reason that I am probably still here right now. After joining in the summer, I ended up going through a very hard time, and even though i had just joined a couple weeks ago. They were there for me. All day. All night. If i needed someone to talk to, or somewhere to stay; they were there.
Now, as a new member, it saddens me to see people arguing saying that the traditional chapters are better then the balanced men chapters. We are all brothers, and all are representing the same values, that of which Sigma Phi Epsilon was based on. Whether a chapter is traditional or balanced man, it does not matter. One way is not better then another, because honestly we are all equal in the end. At least, that is what I have been told.
This is just my two cents... i don't know. You can say that through the balanced man program you don't build as much brotherhood, but I can honestly say that no matter what kind of chapter we are, this same brotherhood would have been built.
V.D.BL,
Brother Thomas
Kentucky SEC -- Soon to be Kentucky ETA
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