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No matter the size of the PNM group, the number of chapters, quota, etc., there will always be a contingency of women who A. don't get their first choice, or B. don't get ANY bids.
In terms of getting one's "first choice" and lamenting that there wasn't enough time for the chapter to get to know your (the general your, not you particularly) fabulous daughter - think about it in the reverse.
What are the standards by which any PNM selects one or two chapters as "her top choices"? Surely there are superficial reasons or limited knowledge that goes into choosing their favorites. I am sure that the Members have just as difficult a decision making THEIR choices. Who one person may see as the perfect PNM, another (or many) may not have had the chance to experience the same. The same thing goes for a girl whom only one has met yet feels strongly about - what if the girl isn't really that chapter's material? Who knows if your daughter really did fit into her first choice? Other than her perceptions, were they really that much of a fit?
Not saying that your daughter does not measure up to the "most beautiful", popular, social group on campus - if that is what her her deam chapter is made of, but how much alike are they really? When it comes down to it, are they similar when it comes to the little things? In my experience, that's what counts!
Before freaking out that your daughter got the shaft by not getting her first choice - and we all agree that NO system is perfect - think about the promise of joy and sisterhood ahead of your daughter. Reality is mostly one's perception.
I hope that your daughter finds happiness in her new home, and that you can allow yourself to be happy that a group really wanted her so badly over maybe hundreds of other girls!
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