I agree with TP after thinking about it that bachelorette/bridal stuff would have to be this summer before the civil ceremony after not only looking at this board, but talking it out with Mom. As for rings, I think I may get my grandmother's wedding band re-sized and wear that for the first year (Mom's idea) - it's a really simple platinum band and thin, no stones. The band that goes with my engagement ring has diamonds in it and stuff so I'll just wear my grandmother's band on my right hand after the religious ceremony next year. Not only will this be more meaningful, but it will also save us from having to buy two bands for me
The only people I think that may have any sort of problem with this is some of his parents friends that I don't know and the only reason I say this is because I don't know them. All of the people I know and that I'm inviting will completely understand (in fact, some of them made this suggestion already). J doesn't really see this as anything more than paperwork though and I guess I need to talk to him and help him realize it means more than that really because we will be legally married (which matters more than only having a religious ceremony since you have to be legal to be married officially) and the perception by people would be that since we're legally married, anything after that would be extra.
ETA: Any other suggestions on things that would change due to doing it this way?