[AOII Angel]

I wasn't trying to chastize you, glamorbomb! You ask if alumnae involvement is worth it. It depends on what you want out of the experience. It is very different than collegiate life. You don't have all of the myriad responsibilities like rush and weekly chapter meeting. You can be as involved or uninvolved as you want. In the end, you get out of the experience what you put into it. To get the experience you want out of it, first decide what that experience is...in detail. Then, do everything you can to make that desire a reality. Sometimes, what you want is not a program currently available, but most chapters are willing to try new things to improve their programming to supply members with their needs.
It sounds like things got a little out of control while you were a collegiate. Forgive them for not being what you needed at the time. In the future, you may be able to help a sister in that same position you were in and show what it is to be a sister to a person in emotional distress. In the end, give it a try...if you don't like it, you can just walk away. There is nothing to lose.