[PrettyBoy]

Originally Posted by cincy

Good one PRETTYBOY- If I am attracted to someone, once they find out Im waiting until I get married to have sex, they either aren't interested anymore or try me out to see if they can "get it". It's funny. Most of the time I can tell if they are truly interested but sometimes i cant tell. its sad.

It's not hard to tell. First you've got to set some dating boundaries. When you have well developed boundaries, you're more drawn to healthy, growing men. Good dating boundaries run off the no good jokers, but they attract the good men who are into responsibility and long term monogamous relationships.

I understand that the 1st attraction to a potential partner is physical attraction. There's nothing wrong with that, because it's the 1st stage of a developing relationship. When we like what we see, we tend to want to see more of what we like. Everyone is different, but for me, physical attraction goes beyond sight, it encompasses all of the senses. I'm attracted to her voice, laughter, cleanliness ect ect. It all depends on what attracts you. You have to also look at character and spirituality. This is much more important than the physical, because it's based on inner qualities. In character attraction, that's what draws us into what's deeply rooted inside. The inner qualities will help you determine if he's into you or just the nookie.

Cincy, you have to ask yourself some questions. You have to ask yourself what are the character traits you believe to be the most important to you in a potential mate? Are these qualities different from what you look for in a friend?

What qualities do you have to offer a potential mate?

Those are just a couple that come to mind.

Another way to determine if a man is into you and not just the nookie is "Time". Dating requires that you spend time together to get to know a person. I'm talking about brief, frequent encounters over a prolonged period. Try to avoid concentrations of time, like spending entire days together, when you first meet a joker. I say this because you need time between encounters to process the information you gain about a person. Never hurry the process, because the more time you spend dating him, the better you're going to know him and the more likely you'll be able to make a rational decision about whether this man is the right one for you. This should be a time of evaluation. That's what dating is all about.

Respect is another key factor. I say this because respect and romance are tied together. A woman who feels that a man respects her, automatically feels that a man is being more romantic toward her. So make sure he respects you before he does anything else. Watch to see if he shows that he enjoys being around you too. If he enjoys your company he'll hang around for that. A man like this finds your companionship more important than the nookie.

When a dating relationship is in good order, each of you can expect several things to happen as an automatic consequence of your spending time together.

Lastly, make sure he serves you. What I mean by this is based on what you said. You said "God said". Well God said for a man to love his wife as Jesus loved the church and gave himself for it. To minister is to serve. A man is to serve his woman/wife, and that DOES NOT mean he's a doormat. Any man that tells you differently is a weak, jellyback man.

Always remember that having a faithful commitment to your significant other is like having a permanent seal affixed to each others lives. I hope you meet your prince charming, but whatever you do....STAY AWAY FROM THE BAD BOYS. I can't stress that enough.