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Same here with my Dad.
And while I agree with what you are saying, the big question becomes what happens when there is no Mom or Dad around to administer the tough love?
I really do think that a kid who feels alone in the world and turns to violence will be very unlikely to change from that course if they are just dumped in jail. That merely justifies their resorting to being "tough" as the only way to survive and have a sense of security.
The discussion I think needs to happen is this- "Who becomes the parent figure in the lives of kids who get in trouble and do not have birth parents willing to fill that role?"
And in that comes a multitude of secondary questions. What are the standards, if any? How can we be sure case by case evaluations are fair and accurate? Let's face it, a poor African-American child is far more likely to be considered "lost" than some wealthy white kid who commits an act of similar gravity.
Child neglect and mistreatment is such a hot button issue with me that I am not always able to discuss it rationally. I don't know why that is since I had a pretty good upbringing, but it gets to me.
I just turned off the TV and I was watching a forum discussion on race on MSNBC. During that forum, one of the participants told the story of a young African-American male who was in court for something he had done and the judge was telling him that he was lucky to be just 2 months shy of 16 since it meant he would go to juvie instead of being at risk for going to prison.
The young man replied that he didn't care where he went as long as it was not home.
That is terrifying.
And it is all the more worrisome given how American society is evolving. For the forseeable future, the US is becoming a country of enormous wealth and leadership driven by labor provided outside of the US.
This just widens the gap between the rich and the poor, and shrinks the middle class.
And in turn, that makes youth who make one mistake or are not raised by good parents all the more likely to fall into a position where they can never get ahead no matter how smart, ambitious or genuinely "good" they are.
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