[zetatheta]

My my! I can't believe all of the chit chat that has occurred since I was last here! (lol) As for the debate about my comment about "difficult new member programs"--that is the exact phrasing of the rumor. Non-greeks never elaborated because they never knew enough about what goes on to elaborate. I assumed at the time that it meant that there might be hazing afoot, and that the whole process was just long altogether. I did believe these rumours, only because of how prominent they are, but at the same time, having met members of the Stars, Triangles, Circles, and Stripes, I knew that there were at least two members in every org who I definetly did not believe would let themselves be hazed. These specific women were so proud that I could not see any of them "degrading" themselves just to go greek...Now back to the story...

It was FINALLY friday, and pref-night. I was really excited because I had no idea what was in store for the PNMs. While I was waiting, I was looking up girls I knew in different houses on facebook. I decided to look up the Panhel president, since she and I had a really nice couple of conversations over the course of the week (mostly me looking for brownie points). Looking at her facebook, she had taken off her affiliated house, so I looked through her photos and found out that she was a Circle. I was surprised that I wasn't surprised. She was beautiful and looked like she should have been a Triangle or a Stripe, but somehow I saw that her personality was not the same as many of theirs, she seemed to fit in with several of the Circles that I met.

Since I knew so many Triangles, several had hinted to me that the attire for pref night was usually very dressy (during formal recruitment) and that if you didn't dress nicely, it was frowned upon. Not wanting to not recieve a bid because of this, I wore one of my nicest dresses. It is black with white pin dots. It actually looks like the dress that the really pretty brunette in the old Yoplait-will-get-you-thin comercials, and I bought it in a botique in Paris---so at the very least it was a good conversation starter.

Waiting in our meeting place with Julie and some of the other girls I felt really confident. I had no idea how pref-night worked, so we were all talking about it anxiously when the really pretty Panhel president announced how it would work. She told us that tonight, we could decide which houses we wanted to finish. She said that all of the houses would have an open door policy, meaning that we could drift in and out as we pleased. She said that while each sorority does like to have ceremonies (rituals) during formal recruitment, that none of them would be doing them tonight so that we could see each house we liked and not worry about missing a ritual. I was a little weary about the looseness of the parties. I decided to talk to the Panhel president--I wanted to know if I could/should go to all the houses or just 1 or 2 or what not. She smiled at me as I approached her. She said hi and greeted me by name. I was excited that she remembered me, and while she listened very sweetly to what I had to say, she didnt really give me a straight answer.

There were no Panhel led parties tonight. Instead everyone would be waiting in our meeting house in case we forgot how to get to a house. Julie and I talked while hoards of girls drifted towards the houses. We decided to visit the Triangle house first.

It seemed that about half of the PNMs had the same idea. There were about thirty five girls standing outside the Triangle sorority lounge. The same stand-off-ish girl was waiting outside, and at exactly 9pm, she opened the lounge door. We all entered the transformed lounge. It was dimly lit with candles (which as an RA, I joked that I should confiscate lol) The sisters had soft music playing and all of the girls were wearing dressy black dresses. I felt already as though I had met every single Triangle sister, and not really found one that I disliked--at the same time, there were a lot who were not altogether very friendly. After being there for a while, I got a little annoyed. The lounge was sort of stuffy with so many girls in there...I felt like more girls were coming in and no one was leaving. I wasn't really suprised by the amount of girls who were in the lounge--the Triangles were after all, one of the "best" and "most competitive" sororities to join. I also felt like all of the sisters kept introducing me to someone else and then someone else until I'd been jostled around the whole sorority. At one point I found Julie on a couch and she seemed a little relieved to see me. I asked her if she wanted to leave and see one of the other houses. She asked me if we could go see the Circles and I said okay. Just as we were about to leave, two sisters asked us why we were leaving, and said that we should stay because they were just about to start. I didn't really know what that meant, but we agreed to stay. About twenty minutes later, I looked over and noticed that they had closed the lounge door. One of the sisters who was one of my friends took my hand and moved me to a different place. Finally arranged, all of the PNMs stood in a very large circle that wrapped around the whole room. Sisters were placed strategically in between PNMs. I was excited. Some of the sisters began to speak, talking about how much they loved their sorority and what it meant to them. I remember that I started to cry a little (im a cryer lol). Finally the sisters seemed to have finished talking. Distinct sisters walked around and took the hands of PNMs. They led them to the middle of the room where they invited the girls to do something (im being a little vague so you will have a slightly harder time guessing the sorority lol). The sisters whispered in the PNMs ears. Finally it was my turn. My Triangle friend took my hand and led me to the middle of the circle. I was crying a little as she whispered "I hope that your wish comes true." I smiled at her and wished that I could be her sister. She brought me back to the line and the ceremony continued until all of the PNMs had been to the middle of the room. The sisters then spoke again and we all began to mingle again. I grabbed Julie and she and I were both a little teary. She still wanted to go and see the Circles so we headed to the door (which had just been opened). As we reached it we saw the co-corricular advisor in charge of greek life. She smiled at us and told us that time was up, that the parties were now over. Julie and I exchanged horrified glances, how had two hours gone by so quickly. We both stood in the lobby of the dorm and talked a little to some friends. We were upset that we had missed all of the other parties, but we both figured that it was okay--after all no had said that there was any correlation between which parties you attended and the bids that you recieved. Back in the lobby of my own dorm, I was talking to the desk attendant--my friend Jaki when my Triangle friend walked by. She smiled at us and then looked down quickly and walked into the building--I noticed that her cheeks were shiny with tears.