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A lot of people say they would not live together and have children but children end up showing up somehow. Cohabitation creates the all-too-familiar context and leads to a lot of things that people do not foresee, in general.
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Children aren't an option for us, so none will just show up "somehow." Besides, I know how that happens!
We actually have faced serious illness but had the POA thing covered beforehand. We have wills, life insurance policies, all the paperwork. We are actually recognized by a court of law as being legally married, so it's a common law thing. It does vary state to state though. We each own a home in our name solely.
I don't think marriage is passe by any means.