Quote:
Originally Posted by MysticCat
But every study I have ever seen says that couples who live together prior to marriage are statistically more likely to divorce than those who do not. For what that's worth. (And I don't know that I've seen any statistics for couples that move in together while engages vs. those who move in together with no specific marriage plans.)
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There are myriad problems with these studies, mostly because the correlation is about as far from the causation as you can get - and ironically, everything I've read is about the opposite of Drole's point, in that those who don't live together are also those philosophically opposed to divorce, or determined to "fight through" when others might feel a split is the best option.
However, I think Drole is exactly right in the YMMV portion - really, most opinions here are based on anecdotes, single personal experiences or remembering really good/bad things that happened to one or two people (selection bias). I don't think either solution is better than the other in general, and unfortunately I'm not sure there is a good way to tell which camp you'll be in until far after the point where you make a decision.
Personally, I
think I would prefer to live with someone - I would doubt that it would occlude my desire to marry that individual because we're "practically married" and I feel like any smart scientist would prefer a test run. I'd like to know that person can handle space issues without resorting to an entirely different building, and I would prefer to get any money issues sorted out while the accounts are still split (or kids are involved), among other things. I also can't think of one good reason why couples that live together first would divorce any more than those who do not other than personal issues, at least not at the rate studies suggest - however, the studies are there, and I can completely understand why others would not, and I could also see myself adding to the statistic should things go wrong.