At my school, each PNM meets individually with her rho chi to get her bid or to learn that she didn't match. Each PNM who gets a bid can then either accept it, defer it for 2 days or so, or decline it. If she accepts, she then goes to her sorority's bid day party and gets lots of gifts. If she defers, she still goes to the party, but doesn't get any gifts unless and until she decides to sign. If she declines, or if she didn't match, she just goes home.
Does anyone else think it's cruel to have PNMs who didn't match show up to a big bid day event, excitedly tear open an envelope, and find that it's just a letter from Panhel notifying them that they didn't match?
