Quote:
Originally posted by lovelyivy84:
What test? Stereotypes of what it means to be black have little if anything to do with reality, and while you WILL find some black folk on "soul patrol" I think there are plenty who will accept you for yourself, with no conditions as to how you behave.
Are you sure that you are not doing it to yourself? Are people really checking to see if you "fit"? Or are you merely stereotyping the first? I know more than a couple of people (black, white, gay, whatever) who were afraid to approach me because they thought I would judge them, when really I am the last one to do so!
So I just think you need to re-examine your own perceptions before you make accusations of things you might be guilty of yourself....
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I know I stereotype, doesn't mean it's right, but don't we all? Regardless, let's get back to my situation: Time and time again, I have failed to "qualify" as a black enough from high school on thru college. When I tried to do what I was "supposed to": join the African Cultural clubs, Caribbean Cultural groups, etc, I did not feel accepted, but I also didn't like them. So, I moved on to drama, my sorority, and other clubs that had nothing to do with race and I made more friends there and felt more accepted and appreciated there...So, now, I just don't even bother! And the beautiful thing is is that I don't HAVE to! I learned my lesson. When you are burned over and over, you learn to not put yourself in that fire again. It's a waste of both my time and theirs, usually. The two black women I am friends with have been persecuted the same way. For example, we are both chastized for dating outside of our race, both of us have been asked "Why you talk so white?" while the person's nose is scrunched up and eyes rolling, and both of us have found that WE DON'T NEED TO PLEASE ANYONE BUT OURSELVES! I am tired of having to justify WHY I don't hang out with any other blacks, I just hang out with people who are like me: we love to laugh, love to have good conversation over wonderful meals, and travel. And I find that the ones who ACCEPT ME FOR WHO I AM AND WHAT I AM have NOT been black!! Why does it BOTHER other black people SO much if I do not to associate with them? I want THAT answered...