Quote:
Originally posted by Imperial11
Okay ladies and gents, tell me what you think.........
I have a male friend, whom I've known for almost 8 years, who is interested in being "more than just friends" now. He has made his feelings for me known for the last year and I constantly try to discourage those feelings by letting him know that I'm not interested in having anything other than a platonic relationship with him. He always says that he understands, but every couple of months he'll start up with that same song and dance about how much "he loves me even though he knows that I don't love him". Like I said, we've been going around and around in this circle for the last year. He always talks about us getting married or whatever in a joking manner, so one day he asked me what kind of ring it would take for me to marry him? So, I jokingly said, "If it's not at least 2-carats don't even ask".
Well.....my b-day is next month, so last night as I was leaving his house, he pulls out a box and says "Well, I know you said it will take at least 2-carats for you to marry me, so I just went ahead and got you 3 to be my girl"! Then he hands me the box, which wasn't a ring, but was this bracelet instead
http://www.zales.com/Products/View_E...MailID=103474.
I almost choked on my tongue. I attempted to give it back, but he said for me to keep it and just think about it. So I left and went home. Once I got home, we talked on the phone and I explained to him why I didn't think that I should keep it, which was because I'm not interested in being "his girl". He told me that even though I don't want to be with him, he wants me to keep the bracelet, because it's a birthday gift that he intended for me to have. I
LOVE the bracelet and I would LOVE to keep it, but I'm not sure if I would be taking advantage of his feelings if I do. I don't want to use him, because 1)I don't use people, especially vulnerable ones and 2)he is an extremely good friend that I don't want to lose. So far, my mom says to give it back and one of my line sisters says to definitely keep it. What do ya'll think?
|
As BEAUTIFUL as that bracelet is, I would say to RETURN it. Simply because, you two don't have the same understanding as to the MEANING AND PURPOSE of the gift. In his mind, it is to show you how much he wants you to be his "girl" and it is a pre-cursor to marriage. As far as I can tell from your post, it is a token of your friendship, but you don't want anything else.
I think that if you give it back, he will understand that you mean what you say, that you only want to be platonic friends. If you keep it, you have automatically blurred the line between friendship and something more serious. And a gift like that is way too expensive to have a misunderstanding over down the road, especially between friends.