[Jimmy Choo]

I found this on one of my friend's myspace pages. If you are a pet lover you should find this absolutly hysterical!





Excerpts from a Dog's Diary:


8:00 a.m. - Dog food! My favorite thing!

9:30 a.m. - A car ride! My favorite thing!

9:40 a.m. - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!

10:30 a.m. - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!

12:00 p.m. - Lunch! My favorite thing!

1:00 p.m. - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!

3:00 p.m. - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!

5:00 p.m. - Milk bones! My favorite thing!

7:00 p.m. - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!

8:00 p.m. - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!

11:00 p.m. - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!



Excerpts from a Cat's Diary:



Day 983 of my captivity. My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre

little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the

other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although

I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must

eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that

keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I

once again vomit on the carpet.



Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their

feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it

clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made

condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am. Bastards!



There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was

placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However,

I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my

confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what that

means, and how to use it to my advantage.



Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my

tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try

this again tomorrow - but at the top of the stairs.



I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches.

The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and

seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.



The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicate with the

guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My

captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell,

so he is safe.



More tomorrow