[SWTXBelle]

honeychile is the LAST person I would accuse of putting on airs. She wrote a reasoned response detailing why certain rules of polite society are not nit-picky, but are instead considerate of other people. Those of us "raised right" as the expression goes would never put on airs - but we also know rudeness and crassness when we see it. It is a free country, as they say, and you may do whatever you wish. However, you do not get to dictate my response to it, and if you chose to belong to a sorority you do have to consider how your actions reflect on that sorority. If you think that a rule is silly, if you are an active bring it up for discussion at your meeting and vote on it would be my suggestion.
JWithers, if your mother attended or debuted at the St. Cecilia's Ball, she followed many rules that may have seemed nit-picky - but I would suggest reading C.S. Lewis' wonderful discussion of ritual and formality in his Introduction to Paradise Lost to understand why the rules do matter, and why your own dear mother undoubtly followed them.
I think it is important to distinguish between rules particular to a certain group, campus or region, and those actions which would be rude, immoral or illegal anywhere. While I do not think anyone would get kicked out of a group for eating her hot dog while walking, participating in a wet t-shirt contest with your letters would seem to warrant a talking to by the standards committee. (I have personal knowledge of the wet t-shirt incident - and the member had trouble understanding what the problem was - "But I won!" she said !!!)