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Note to the XYZ fraternity guys next door:
No, you are neither clever nor funny when you set off bottle rockets outside of my dorm at 4am, and I'd really appreciate it if you'd vomit somewhere other than right below my window. Also, let's think about learning some pattern recognition skills - after the fifth or sixth time of setting off your own fire alarm with the aforementioned bottle rockets and yelling a dismayed "DUDE! F*CK!" each time, I'd think you would have caught on. Apparently I have vastly overestimated your intelligence, assuming that because you managed to gain acceptance to one of the most prestigious academic institutions in the nation, you would also have some reasonable amount of common sense. I was wrong. Next time, I'm calling campus police. Nobody comes between me and my sleep.
Sincerely,
DukeBlue
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