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I know sometimes being in a sorority does require one to give up small individual freedoms for the greater good...but I've never understood ANY rationalization of the attempt to change who a woman is for the sorority. Maybe because my campus is more liberal...here we ALL stress, repeatedly, that we won't change you, except for the better...and that's something you have control of. And it's true...I don't think any of the five NPC groups here change their women to fit a stereotype.
I read what the president had to say. Part of the problem, I think (though I've never been to DePauw, just read about it) is the campus culture in regards to the Greek system, as well as the DZ officials' desperation to keep the chapter, instead of risking its loss for the greater good. For instance,
"I didn't feel like I had to change who I was. I feel like they accepted me for who I am. They helped me grow. I probably wouldn't have even thought of being chapter president except for a couple girls in the house said, "I think you'd be great for it.""
THAT is what should be important. Not numbers, quotas, clothes, brands, fakeness, plastic....what she is describing is what sisterhood is about. If you join for sisterhood you joined to have a family away from home...and family accepts you for who you are, and loves you for it.
"I wasn't a big fan of chanting for recruitment or dressing up for weekly meetings. But I didn't mind singing before formal dinners because it's a ritual, and I've never been part of an organization that had rituals. Doing some of the things our founders did and honoring that was kind of cool."
Every chapter's requirements for chapter, or their attitude towards it, is different. Here, most of the sororities don't require every chapter to be badge dressed. That's because not all women are in love with high heels and uncomfortable dresses. What she did enjoy, though, was ritual. Ritual is far, far, FAR more important than the stupid songs we all sing during rush. It's what and who we are.
I see a woman who had a real sisterhood, based on family bonds. She honestly admits to not dressing up...but that doesn't mean she didn't when told to. She doesn't like the chants...it doesn't mean she didn't do them. Personally, I hate them. I'm not outgoing. But I put a smile on my face and chant like I'm on speed like every other sorority woman on campus, and keep that perm-a-smile on until the last PNM leaves. I prepare questions before they come in, and I fill awkward pauses if they're shy. Do I like it? No. Probably most of the PNMs don't either. I want them to feel as comfortable as possible, because its not their faults that they've been thrown into a room of loudly chanting women in matching outfits. If someone asked me what I didn't like about the process, that would be part of it. Will I and do I do it anyway? Of course...and always to the best of my ability. She could very well be the same.
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