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Awww Carnation, I'm sorry!
If you haven't already, please send a 'kind' note to that little boy's mother. I will admit that I'm not a parent, but I have had experiences working with children with disabilities and children with behavioral disorders. Some parents are a little 'blind' to how their children behave when they aren't around. While a little note may not really do much, in many cases can serve as a) a warning for how people perceive their child (and really their parenting skills) and/or b) piece of mind for you to know that you could nicely get off your chest that this kid is a terror and not feel so bad when this kid isn't invited next year.
I was once at a party for a darling little girl that I babysat for in college and spotted this little boy's 'girl equivalent'. This child was such a terror she drove the birthday girl to tears multiple times. While I knew it wasn't my business at all, I knew it was really no skin off my back if these parents didn't like me or not; I got their address from the birthday girl's folks (who were really so stunned and upset the mother handed off this girl to her folks and said, 'Please call me tomorrow about how "Brittany" behaved herself today; if she's here any longer I may lose my cool'). I wrote a quick note about what I observed and slipped it in their mailbox on my way home (they apparently only lived about 2 blocks away from the birthday girl). Before Birthday Girl's parents had a chance to attempt to talk to "Brittany's", "Brittany's" mother was on the phone profousely apologizing and offering to take BG's Mom to lunch to mend some fences. Apparently, Brittany was also told to write an apology note to BG (they were both 7 at the time). I know it really gave BG's folks a piece of mind to work this out.
If you didn't really know this kid beforehand, I'm sure you won't care what his parents think of you if they don't receive 'friendly-criticism' well. You don't strike me as the type who would be upset if your son doesn't get to go to the creep's birthday. Sounds like a bad influence.
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