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Dude, go have a beer or 12 and relax. You're driving yourself crazy because your friend is being an asshole -- you're making her problem (being an asshole) your problem (driving yourself crazy).
Until you hear otherwise, why not just assume that there's a good chance it's not even happening. Unless they're getting married at the Elvis Drive Through of Love, there's a very good chance they'd already have this stuff figured out and I can't imagine why they'd keep the information from you. If someday she gets her shit together and by then you can't get your dress or plane tickets are too expensive for you to attend, too bad so sad she shouldn't have been an asshole.
ETA: I would NOT call dude. I suspect there is some drama afoot with them.
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A hiney bird is a bird that flies in perfectly executed, concentric circles until it eventually flies up its own behind and poof! disappears forever....
-Ken Harrelson
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