[OleMissGlitter]

All of the weddings I have been in have been out of state because I don't live in my hometown anymore. I did not attend some of the showers and luncheons because I didn't have time with work to drive 6 hours home for one night or one luncheon/tea. I told my friends up front that if you want me in your wedding please realize I might not be able to go to everything but I'll be there on the "big day." I would also politely tell your bride-to-be friend that you will be in her wedding but you need to know specifics or else you cannot take off from work/school/etc. Just tell her that you need to know so you can plan your travel arrangements and the longer she takes the more expensive it gets for you. As far as a dress goes, I thought you had to order a bridesmaid's dress like at least a few months ahead of time for fittings and things. I realize this is your friend's "big day" but she might end up being called a "big pain" if she doesn't get her act together. And in the long run she might end up losing some friends.