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Imma keep it REAL
Regarding rejection letters...all of that "stay strong", "don't be discouraged" stuff SOUNDS real good...
BUT IF YOU HAVE NEVER RECEIVED A REJECTION LETTER, YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IT IS LIKE OR HOW YOU WILL REACT.
It is discouraging. You don't feel strong and focused - you feel WEAK and DISAPPOINTED and BITTER. EXTREMELY BITTER. Especially when you see people who made line and you KNOW that your credentials are better than theirs. To tell someone who has been rejected that they cannot "compare themselves to someone who made it" is crazy - that's ALL you do when you see that line walk by... You sit and point out women who made line and think, "She failed math last semester and barely has a 2.5 - I thought they said only 2.75 and above would make it?...Lawd, she has slept with half the football team - how in the world did she make it?...I been rushing for 2 years and I've never even SEEN that chick before - how did SHE make it?" And so on. People coming up to you and saying "congratulations, I heard they picked up the Delta line" and your reply is, YEAH, BUT I'M NOT ON IT. Until you've actually been there - it's impossible to fathom.
"Don't take it personally"? How else are you supposed to take it? It IS personal. And I'm sorry Soror DST_philosop4, but prospectives get rejected "with malicious intent" every Spring and Fall - that's just the ugly truth about fraternities and sororities. Malicious is "deliberately harmful; spiteful" - and sometimes, it's like that. I'm just keepin it real here.
So I'm not going to give that "keep ya head up" pep talk, because I've been there, and that's the LAST thing you want to hear when you get a reject letter, believe me.
I joined Delta through an Alumnae chapter 8 years after being rejected as an undergrad. As an undergrad, I attended several rushes, and if I had a dime for every Delta function I supported, I would use it to pay my dues for next year. What did I do after I got rejected? Well, at the time, I was being initiated into an honors fraternity, so that took most of my attention (and NO, that's not why I got rejected, because two of my honors fraternity linesisters made the Delta line that semester). My grades were already excellent, I was already doing public service, so I just continued doing the same things I was already doing before I got rejected.
I just always knew I'd become a Delta, and if that chapter didn't want me, then it was their loss - there are Delta chapters all over the place, and I knew I'd find one that would be HAPPY to have me. As others, including my sister, became Deltas, I was very happy for them - I knew that one day I would join them, and I did.
To "southernbelle" - about your friend making it and you not making it - you will learn if this women is TRULY your friend or not. I had many so-called friends who made it when I didn't, and once I was rejected, they tripped out...suddenly they were too good for me, better than me...or so they thought. I learned who my REAL friends were when I got rejected, and made some new ones too.
The advice I'd give to someone who gets a reject letter is...
GET MAD!! KICK SOMETHING!! SCREAM AT THE TOP OF YOUR LUNGS!!
Then shake it off and get on with your life. And wait - your time will come when it's supposed to come, and not before. Oh, and don't forget to SAVE THAT LETTER FOR YOUR SCRAPBOOK WHEN YOU DO FINALLY MAKE IT. My reject letter is right in front, followed by my invitation.
I won't lie and say you aren't going to be bitter, because you ARE GOING TO BE BITTER. When it's meant to be, if it's meant to be, then you'll achieve it. My path to Delta was much longer than I thought it would be, but it was DEFINITELY the right path FOR ME.
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