Scandia,
You should really think more positively about your situation. There are plenty of "good men" left. You may have to do a lot more negotiating than you thought. Don't settle for this guy! You will drive yourself crazy if you try to get into a relationship that lacks a certain chemistry. When I was in graduate school, I had two short term relationships that lacked a certain "spark". With the first guy, I had NO physical attraction; we remained friends and that didn't even work. The second guy and I were so different that I practically drove myself nuts trying to make it work. I couldn't even be friends with the second guy because he was just so wrong for me.
Very rarely is it easy to remain friends with someone you dated... even if "dated" means going on a handful of dates. Only once in my adult life have I beel able to be good friends with someone I met through an online dating site (the onion/spring street networks).
I wouldn't say a divorced man is necessarily bad. People enter marriages for really wrong reasons- thankfully, he left when he did. (If he cheated on her, that's different. If she cheated on him, I don't blame him for leaving.) While it is hard, you can't really fault someone for being widowed. I'd say stay away from separated guys until the divorcer is final- but that's just what I'd do.
Additionally, people have had great luck with match and eharmony- give 'em a shot! Keep us posted!
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