Welcome to GC,
There is a discussion regarding extension on inCircle. Look for it in the main Community section.
I am happy that you and your friend are so excited about the possibility of AOII at Clemson. It is a great school and one where any group would be proud to have a chapter.
As a member of NPC, AOII and the other member groups must abide by certain extension protocol. The Clemson Panhellenic Association must decide if there is a need for another sorority, vote to expand and invite the sorority who is the best fit. Need is determined in a variety of ways but most commonly if the chapters are getting too large.
To answer some of your specific questions,
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… she could start a chapter with friends (becoming a local sorority) and apply to AOII for absorption?
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The best person for her to talk to is the person in charge of Greek Life. Some universities do not allow locals. I am not sure if Clemson is one or not. Also, there is no guarantee that AOII would accept them if AOII is invited to colonize.
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I'm honestly thinking about advising her just to start a local sorority anyway -- regardless of whether absorption is available to her as a possibility -- because she just did not feel that any of the NPC sororities already on campus were right for her or what she was looking for.
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Starting a local, if it is permissible on her campus, is not any easy task and not to be taken lightly. She will most probably need chapter advisers, liability insurance, proof of chapter programming etc. There is a Locals forum on GC that gives some insight.
If you have any further questions about extension, please feel free to e-mail me.