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I agree with PKTSU01. You have my deepest sympathy for your losses. As a fellow New Yorker, I have also been affected. I went to my 23 year old firefighter neighbor's funeral earlier this month. I never had any room in my life for b.s. or cruelty, but the tragedy put things in perspective for me. It reinfoced the things that I knew to be true. Every life is special and precious, and every day that we have is a gift from God. (I hope that I don't sound like a holy roller.) I decided that I want to live my life making a positive impact on people's lives not a negative impact. I decided not to let the little things bother me. Everyone has a choice. You can be kind or cruel, and believe me, there is enough cruelty out there. I hope that at his time of year, particularly this year, we can all exercise a little goodwill toward our fellow mankind. For me kindness and goodwill equal forgiveness and generosity and ultimately happiness.
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