Question, if she were to drop in the spring, how the heck could she rush in the fall? That's not a year. So we aren't doing a total mini-hijack, could someone please pm me the answer. I'm a little confused.
As for the situation at hand, I've felt the exact same way. That's life, you always wonder about the "road not taken". I definately felt the way you are when things were pretty down in my life and I had some negative feelings regarding ADPi. Eventually my life got better and the negative feelings disappeared.
I can guarantee that you aren't going like everything about your sorority. Your going to see things, hear things that you're thinking "why are we doing this? What is going on?". A sorority membership is for life. It's just not for your four years of college. If there is something you don't like, that you know can be changed (ie. ritual cannot), stay involved, run for office. When you graduate join the alum association. Like someone pointed out already, new members join, new officers are elected so things change.
I would recommend talking to a sister you trust (and who you know will keep what you say to herself). Express your concerns and your fears. I'm sure she probably felt the same way. I would also recommend sticking it out. But with that being said, if you still feel uncomfortable when initiation rolls around, DO NOT INITIATE! Because, again, once you are an initiated member of an NPC that's it. No return to go, no collecting of $200 (my monopoly reference
).