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Originally Posted by ariesrising
Before I contacted anyone I'd done literally years worth of research. Even though I thought I knew what I was getting into - alumnae membership as an alum initiate isn't the same as collegiate membership, and it's not even the same as "regular" alum membership. You don't have a bond with these women, who already have one. It can be incredibly difficult to feel like a part of things, even as an initiated sister (and when you're shy like me, it's even harder lol).
I think a lot of the "down side" of AI is brushed under the rug on GC and I feel that PNAMs may be getting the idea that it's all sunshine and roses once you are a successful AI. (Just as PNMs may be surprised with what "real" sorority membership is actually like)
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Yes, yes, yes!! Everything she said - yes!!
The so-called "down side" of AI should be mentioned because it is
not necessarily all sunshine and roses (as ariesrising mentioned).
As an example, as an AI I never had the benefit of having a song chair to teach me Tri Delta songs. Another example is I never had the experience of weekly meetings to experience ritual and meeting protocol on a regular basis. You really need to be motivated all the time to put yourself out there and put your best face forward and be pro-active to get things moving initially, even after your initiation, when you may only know a handful of people really well. It is
not instant friendships and bonding by any means just because you've gone through a ceremony. You need to establish and nurture that yourself on an on-going basis, which is true for any important relationship.
Did I realize all this before I was invited to membership? Absolutely. I had no illusions whatsoever. I knew it might be awkward initially but I also figured I was motivated enough and loved the organization enough that I would give it my best and make it work. I knew I would eventually come "up to speed" and be a fully contributing member, but that it
would most definitely take a lot of work and initiative on my part, long after the initiation ceremony.