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Originally Posted by AXO Alum
If people would learn that ONLY the people's names written on the inner envelope are invited, we wouldn't have the problem of including it on the invitation! So many people get that envelope & assume that "Mr. & Mrs. John Smith" automatically = AND KIDS which is absolutely does not. Nor does "Ms. Jane Smith" automatically = AND GUEST, but I digress...
ShaedyKD, although it is not proper etiquette to include "adults only" on the actual invitation, more & more couples are finding themselves having to add it because people either don't understand, or don't WANT to understand, that the names listed on the inner envelope are the only invited guests. As a wedding planner, I would prefer the faux pas of wording it on the invitation versus the faux pas of having unruly kids show up for the event.
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My cousin did something I liked, even though not proper etiquette it seemed to work well for them. When they invited people who had younger children (cousins under 10 mostly) they included a short personal note saying "While we love children, we would perfer not to have them at our wedding. Thank you in advance for your understanding." In our family it's common to invite the whole family to weddings if you are related, but they felt like any of the kids under 10 would be bored and have trouble behaving. When they returned from their honeymoon they had a housewarming party where they invited everyone including the younger kids and asked it be sans gifts.