[Scandia]

KDDani- I am working very hard this year on loving myself, so that someday I can love another in a healthy way. I know that men and women can be just friends. I have had platonic male friends- including a pretty close one in college that came to visit me long distance and that I attended the wedding of. I will be seeing another male friend this weekend at a convention.

I'm just not good with the relationship stuff. I do not know how much I should let out, but it has nature and nurture components. And I don't have much confidence, hence at times I feel I do have to justify my feelings and preferences.

Regarding intuition, once I saw the boyfriend of one of my good friends talking to some girl in the bus at UF. Now I talked to billions of guys and girls on the bus every day. They did not seem to be flirting. They were not touching or hugging each other. Conversation was small talk. Yet my gut responded automatically- I got this feeling in my stomach that something was not right between him and my friend. That night, my friend called me to tell me she broke up with him. It has reacted in similar ways regarding breakups of other friends recently. They did not have to say that they were breaking up/divorcing for me to know- and sometimes the hints they dropped were not direct or related at all.

You are right in that this is a slightly different situation, since it involves making a couple rather than breaking one.

And regarding convincing myself out of feelings, at this point it is still feasible and rather easy if he were taken indeed. I tend to lose interest very quickly once I find out someone is taken. However, it will hurt more- since he was taken by someone else he may have met at the same time he met me.