Good question!
I have come to this quandry a couple of times in my life and have seen the actives of my chapter go through it as well.
I found that there is no solid anser for me. Rather, the feelings I had were eminating from the fact that only a handfull of members truly cared to take the House in new directions while the rest resisted the change or just went along for the ride.
To this day we still have this problem - although it is getting better.
Advice:
I would start by assuring the member that they are NOT alone in their feelings. Like anything else you delve into, there is always a sense of "what if" that permeates about your decision - especially to joina chapter.
Let them know that a lifetime commitment can and is mutual in most cases. You can STILL get as much from a greek organization being an alumni as you would if you were active. The rewards, however, are less tangible... (and you tend to remeber them Sunday morning ;0)).
Finally, point them to the poem "The Road Not Taken" by Frost.
thanks again and good luck with your inquiry.
mike
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