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Originally posted by SKEEphistAKAte
PerfectVerse: It sounds to me like your boyfriend is insecure. There could be a number of reasons, for instance, he may be "jealous" of the organization itself and think that if you become a member you will get so wrapped up in the org that you will forget about him. Or on the other hand, he may feel like, if you are asked to join, you will no longer think he is good enough because he isn't greek. My advice would be to address his insecurities and reassure him that neither of the above scenarios would be the case.
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Thanks for the good advice. I think you are exactly right. It's probably a combination of both reasons. He's a lil insecure as is, and I think if I were to become greek that insecurity of his may increase ten-fold. The fact that I'd be away doing community service projects, going on trips to meet other members, attending parties, and of course he's scared of the frat guys hitting on me. But his insecurities are something that we've had a problem with for a little while now, it's just that now he's attacking something that's near and dear to my heart and that's not cool.
I think he is jumping the gun anyway. It's not like I've been extended an invitation or something, so all of the 'XYZ Sorority' bashing is crazy. He was even making petty comments about the sorority and stated that he doesn't like it. Well, he doesn't have to like it as long as I do.
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2. If given an ultimatum by a SO now, I would definitely not be a supportive person about it. Like how I just told PerfectVerse to reassure him, I don't even think I'd do that, LOL. I would probably dismiss the guy as an insecure idiot and never speak to him again. I'm super BS-intolerant these days, and I detest insecurity in any form. But that's just me.
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LOL!! I think that it's a lil different in this case for you because you are already a member of Alpha Kappa Alpha. If someone were to give you an ultimatum, it would be ridiculous because your sorority is apart of who you are. That's like someone telling you to grow 4 more inches because they like tall women or it's over between you two. Or get rid of your child because they don't want to date someone with kids. You knew the child existed before the relationship began, so don't even try it.
I still think Mr. Perfect is jumping the gun here because nothing has happened as far as me becoming a member, so I think he needs to chill and we need to have a heart-to-heart about it. I've told him before that his insecurities were going to be the death of us, and if he keeps this up this relationship is going to be pushing up daisies!