[AKA_Monet]

Well, eHarmony is makin' a killin' off some folks... Then there are these other ones that are fakin' the funk and takin' folks money...

The other issue is more African American men have a rap sheet that African American women, especially highly educated ones do not want to deal with... Generally, men with felony convictions lose too many "rights"--they cannot apply for certain jobs, they cannot get loans, they cannot go to school, they cannot vote, etc. and so on and so forth. Who would want to deal with that, drama? And it is so easy to arrest a brotha these days for just about anything, which is sad because it is crazy...

Sistahs on the other hand, don't want the heartache moreso than the headache. It is too much heart trouble to deal with alienation and abandonment from man, that we have come to the conclusion that "I may as well be better off by myself" satisfaction... We still want the "luxury" of having a loving relationship with a man, but is a whole lot easier to write off that feeling than to invest into the heart wrenching pain when things don't go as anticipated.

It is a matter of degree, I think. What can we tolerate and deal with at this time? Then how much are we willing to walk into a situation with our eyes wide open, knowingly going into a something that might be a hornet's nest...