Quote:
Originally posted by Honeykiss1974
Even before I became an active Christian I thought living together was not a wise thing to do. The lack of legal recourse alone was enough to keep me away from it not to mention "getting the milk for free" idea. So while I respect other cultures and their traditions, I do not think we should just through out the "baby with the bathwater" in terms of marriage in the US nor blame the lack of support for co-habitation on Christians.
Maybe its a generational thing for us (because let's face it - this is an age of instant gratification - a mentality of "if you don't like it, go out and get a new one"). You can live together with everyone you date from here until you die, but if you don't have the drive, determination or even wit to understand what a marriage is, much less the amount of WORK it takes to keep it going, you will always find something that the other person is doing and use it as an excuse to not marry him/her.
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Absolutely. The culture of the U.S. doesn't support co-habitation. We don't take it seriously enough and generally don't consider it a pre-cursor for marriage. I certainly wouldn't advise American Christians to live together!
But, in other cultures, co-habitation is part of the marriage contract. And, I believe that in the U.S. we are quickly losing our understanding of what marriage is to be (and I include Christians here - let's not lie to ourselves, the high divorce rate does not escape "Christian" marriages).
The concept of marriage for millenia - and the concept as it stands across this world - is that marriage is a vocation and a contract. This is even a biblical concept! Marriage is not intended for selfish gain but is a union for the greater good.
It is for reconciliation between families, deals between countries, caring for the family of another. But, despite what too many seem to believe, there is no formula for biblical marriage. "The proper marriage" is not found only in the U.S. or in our view of what a wedding/marriage should be.
Biblical marriage is based on God and a single principle: sacrifice. We are to sacrifice our needs for the needs of the other. But, in doing so, our needs ARE met, because our partner is meeting ours and we are meeting theirs. If a couple is committed to this principle, for life, the method of becoming married is not as much of an issue.
The rate of children out-of-wedlock is a direct result of the instant gratification you're talking about, Honeykiss. We don't understand what love, marriage and family are.